Disagreements
can be awful, especially when they are of a personal nature. Unfortunately, my
last one was with a friend who revealed a very ugly side to them. Honestly
speaking, I have caught glimpses of this behavior before, however, due to it never
being directed to me previously…we’d talk about it (as it was involving someone
else) and then move on. This time, it was directed straight at me and
definitely below the belt. I wanted to make sure that I actually heard what I
thought I heard, so I asked that the statement be repeated (and yes, I was
correct). After what appeared to be time standing still, I verbally stated
exactly how the statement (which was
incorrect) made me feel as a reflection for the other person. Then instead
of probing, I chose to separate from the situation as the
environment was no longer positive or supportive anymore. In the emotion of
things, it’s always best practices to stop, wait for a calmer moment with a
clearer mind, then have the courageous discussion. This practice can at least
prevent you from experiencing a moment of regret yourself. Many awkward moments
could be avoided if more people would take their time and simply think about
the other person before they speak.
It can be so difficult to think with a clear head when it comes to personal disagreements, especially when it comes from those you least expect it too. Many times I give people too much benefit of the doubt and don't ever believe that they will do to me what they have done to other people. Then I feel the fool later. It sounds like you and I are very similar, and I wish you luck with this in the future!!
ReplyDeleteDantaya,
ReplyDeleteYou did right thing by walking away from the situation even though I probably wouldn't have done that if it were me. As I have changed my way of saying and doing things these past few years, I now will not respond to situations that are offensive because my response wouldn't be in a positive manner. As you stated that thinking before you respond is the best solution. Not responding at the time and having more time to think about the situation will allow a person to handle the situations in a more appropriate and less confrontational experience.