Does Sound Make a Difference???

It’s amazing how taking away the ability to communicate verbally and/or non-verbally can cause unnecessary misinterpretation of what appears to be happening. In watching the show “The Big Bang Theory” (which is not typically part of my routine), I totally mistaken one of the characters, “Sheldon” as a person firmly upset with everyone he came in contact with. I honestly couldn’t determine which were his friends, however, I could detect (based on subjective facial expressions of approval), when there were agreements between characters such as “Penny” and “Leonard” in the presence of Sheldon. Leonard (who is Sheldon’s roommate) and Penny (who lives in the same building as Sheldon and Leonard), both were more physically expressive (i.e. smiles, nods, body/hand gestures, etc.) than their counterpart which can give the impression that no one can get along with Sheldon, however, they can get along with one another.

Adding sound immediately dispelled the show being one that is more on the serious side. In fact, it’s quite hilarious, with Sheldon being one of the funnier characters (in my opinion). What his character lacks in visual/physical expressions, is definitely made up in his selection of responsive words. As Sheldon’s girlfriend, “Amy” was added to some of the scenes; it became obvious why they’re attracted to one another. Amy appears to be a female version of Sheldon, possessing a lack in expressing physical cues and emotions. She does have the same dry sense of humor which can cause a shock factor to some of her responses and comments being made. To me, they are simply hilarious (to put it mildly). Sheldon and Amy are both geniuses and therefore, much of what they are saying, thinking, or doing goes over the heads of the other characters, but they seem to get it as a couple. I do believe that if this had been a show I normally watched, I would have been more familiar with the characters’ behaviors and therefore most likely able to predict what may happen next. It was very difficult for me to try and make the connections of what the relationships were first without sound, and second without some prior history of the show. This just reiterates the importance of all forms of communication.

Dr. Joy's Lifetime Lessons

I had the pleasure of meeting (through a partnership with her company) a Behavior Therapist that I will refer to as Dr. Joy. I first saw her in action when she was contracted to work with a very aggressive mother who felt her entire world was caving in on her all at once!!! A low paying job, a full-time student, single parent of 3 (spouse was recently deceased); poor means of transportation, and no other support system… just to mention a few things that were currently going on. And now to make matters worse in her eyes, the possibility of a suspected diagnosis of Autism for the middle aged child wasn’t helping to say the least. During a very sensitive meeting to discuss with Mom the concerns and potential solutions, she (Mom) became verbally aggressive and hostile. At this moment, Dr. Joy calmly explained that we all can recognize how difficult taking all this information in could be with the recent loss of her husband (the lifetime partner who was suppose to assist in handling situations like these). With a gentle and kind voice, Dr. Joy stated that we had discussed matters regarding the child long enough, so… tell us, and how are you Mom? With just that question at that perfect timing, Mom opened up to share all her grief and concerns with being a newly single parent of 3 with the total responsibility of everything. In seeing her despair and need, Dr. Joy offered her free counseling sessions in the home so that childcare wouldn’t be an issue (weekends included, if necessary). Mom agreed and was then able to move forward with making decisions for having her son complete the necessary assessments and evaluations.

Afterward during a conversation that Dr. Joy and I had one on one, she mentioned that the sole purpose for her becoming a licensed therapist wasn’t for the money, but to help others through their trying times as God meant for her to. It was her purpose and she had made peace with it a long time ago. Dr. Joy passed away from a battle with Cancer most recently; however, her lessons/gift of recognizing when and how to help others help themselves remains with me daily. Her ability to “LISTEN” and “SEE” all people regardless of their circumstances was remarkable and I am fortunate to have taken every opportunity to have learned through the lessons she modeled. 

                                                                                               

  

The Point of It All

One of my greatest hopes is to always have the ability to holistically accommodate the individual needs of every family regardless of their diverse backgrounds and circumstances. There is a difference between hearing and truly listening to what is being shared with you. I want to listen, understand, and assist in supporting and providing the equity needed to create an even playing field so that opportunities are fair and equal.

As an early childhood professional, the goal should always be to know as much as possible about all issues and concerns related to topics of diversity, equity, and social justice. Since you never know what needs families will present, it’s good to always have a strong networking system to reach out to for advice and guidance. There is no need to re-invent what already works, so gaining the insight from others is valuable in being a well-rounded provider of services. The answers are embedded in our ability, as people, to work together despite our differences for the betterment of the world. We all have something to contribute, and therefore everyone holds a key to successfully eliminating injustices.

I want to send out a special “thank you” to everyone who shared stories that help me grow personally and professionally. I appreciate this beyond my ability to express it in words. 

 

http://happytruelife.wordpress.com/2012/06/27/daily-truth-only-as-a-collective/only-as-a-collective-human-spirit-can-we-vanquish-gree-hatred-and-war/

Welcoming A New Family

The new arriving family to my social service agency is coming from the country of Laos (surrounded by China, Thailand, and Vietnam). In my efforts to be supportive in constructing a welcoming and comfortable environment for all members of the family, the following attempts will be made to prepare; 

·         I would contact former colleagues from the International YMCA (World YMCA http://www.ymca.int) to inquire about speaking to someone employed by them that comes from Laos. This conversation would hopeful give me better insight of some informal and formal customs and practice of their culture.

·         I would also attempt to contact a professor in the International Studies Department at a local University to also have a conversation and share the information that I gathered from International YMCA. During this time, I would compare data to ensure that nothing was unintentionally being left out.

·         Of course, reaching out to colleagues and friends who maybe from Laos, know someone from the country, or worked with a family and have personal/professional firsthand experience in providing quality services would be the next option. Why reinvent to wheel when one already exist through learning from mistakes previously made by others willing to share.

·         Another valuable resource would be inquiring whether there is a Laotian Embassy in/or near my city to contact for additional facts and guidance on what I could do to holistically embrace a family arriving from the country. 

·         Lastly, visiting reliable internet sources and trying to successfully implement the things I’ve learned would be my final goal. Asking someone with prior experience to assess me through role playing would give me the necessary feed back to make adjustments as needed. 

These preparations are mutually to benefit the family (displaying a passion of wanting to learn more about them) as well as an educational opportunity for me (making me more culturally well rounded and appreciative of others). 

 

http://nicolesjourneyinlaos.wordpress.com/2013/03/30/hong-hien-school-part-1/

The Personal Side of Bias, Prejudice, and Oppression

My First Experience: 

Moments of prejudice and bias are unforgettable to most everyone involved whether as the receiver or initiator. Based on my recollection, the first noted negative encounter I experienced related to the color of my skin was directed to an elder family member. My day was filled with the excitement of tagging along on a trip to the furniture store for a new living room set. The current one had been in place since before I was born and I was then ten years old and counting. I recall walking around the enormous store room reviewing all the merchandise in stock. After a while, my family member signaled a sales clerk to come over while making a comment out loud about waiting a long period of time for a simple acknowledgement of just being in the store while other white customers were being greeted and helped. Surprisingly to me, there was no apologize or smile, instead the implicit message through interpersonal oppression given off by the sales clerk displayed her focus on providing quality service to the white customers only.

As memory would have it, I recall another sales clerk (who was of African American descent) assisted us in completing the transaction and also receiving a hefty commission on the sale which was paid in cash. The attitude and assumption that as African American people, we did not possess the means to buy expensive furniture and therefore would be wasting the time of the previous sales clerk, caused her preconceived notions and biases to disrespect and devalue what my grandmother had to offer the store monetarily. Due to that experience, I am always mindful of the quality of service being provided to me. In addition, I also, regardless of religion, class, race, etc, provide all people with the best service I have to offer to prevent repeating the discomfort and humiliation felt by us that November day. 

The Caucasian sale clerk should treat all customers (even potential ones) with the same level of respect and eliminate her personal views and opinions in the work place (if not totally).